Hey, it's Cory McCabe. 👋🏼
Welcome to the 4:3!
On the 4th of every month, I share 3 things worth your while, either in film or my personal learnings (this one's a little late).
Today, I hope these 3 values of mine benefit your day and life.
1. Be Eager to Listen
According to a survey, 96% of people believe they are good listeners.
A separate study showed that even though the average adult listens nearly twice as much as he or she talks, half of test-takers asked to sit through a 10-minute oral presentation couldn't describe its content moments after. 48 hours later, 75% percent couldn't even recall the subject matter.
Larry Ponemon of the Ponemon Institute tested 1,000 adults nationwide for listening comprehension. He asked participants questions about videos shown to them, and found that women answered 66% correct, while men scored only 49%. This discrepancy cut across age, income, and even education.
While we live in an increasingly distracted society and culture, combatting this problem can be achieved, and starts with removing some of the constant stimulation throughout the day.
Teaser: Tip #1 in the video above, Julian Treasure suggests sitting in silence for 3 minutes to recalibrate and improve your ability to pay attention.
2. Don't Rely on Assumptions
Will your beliefs about a person, their intentions, or what they mean, be accurate 100% of the time?
If your answer is "no", then you understand something important: we aren't perfect and even our well-intended assumptions can be wrong.
While operating from social cues and our own intuition can be powerful, relying on them fully can lead to misunderstanding and misjudgements.
Personally, I default to immediately assessing any assumptions. "Does this person mean what I think they mean?" "Does my interpretation of their tone or inflection line up with the character they've shown?" "Are we working off of the same definitions of words?" "What questions could I ask to better understand?"
I'll leave you with this, it costs you nothing but a little time to make sure you truly understand someone, what they mean, or their intentions, with a simple, genuine question for clarity.
In doing this, you will also demonstrate that you care about listening well.
3. Stay Curious
Being curious can be defined as "a desire to know."
Without curiosity, there would be no innovation, our minds would cease to grow, and we would stagnate as a species.
There is even evidence that curiosity breeds positive social outcomes.
In one study, people who showed curiosity felt closer to their partners during intimate and small-talk conversations, while less curious people anticipated poor outcomes in conversations.
Next time you find yourself facing a problem, hitting a dead end, or in a confusing situation, take a step back and ask yourself, "What would it look like to be curious?"
Allow yourself to wonder, question, and examine things for what they are, or what they could be.